Spade = Spade

Ex-tyrant Murdered in Cold Blood

Did he deserve it? Hell, yes; in spades.

But if we're going to tolerate this kind of thing, the minimum requirement is to call it what it is.

Bear facts: Approaching average smartness

Alexander Graham Bell didn't invent the telephone (sort-of knew that one), Walter Raleigh had bugger-all to do with introducing potatoes to Europe (new fact, but entirely believable) and the Arctic was named after the brown/grizzly bear, ursus arctos (bear bear); not the polar bear, ursus maritimus (sea bear), and more bogglingly, not vice versa!

You're never too old to learn frankly dubious new shit from your favourite TV personalities.

Frying tonight

The Book We All Got This Christmas seems to be "The Book of General Ignorance", aka "QI: The Handbook", complete with cartoon Stephen Fry and Alan Davies on the cover. To be honest, I did actually ask for this one; definitely my postcode.

Of course, Boxing Day is the traditional slot for reading these things, so expect to see entries over the next few days saying things like "I never knew that Mexico was a state of the USA", and "You know, I'm fairly sure that Bob Dylan really did write 'All Along The Watchtower'..."

Clumsy or Random

I feel honour-bound to plug the new(ish) BBC science fiction website, My Science Fiction Life; partly because I owe the editor half a pint of lager and lime (thanks to a bizarre Al Murrayesque experience shared in a Cardiff drinkery), partly because it's a fun new sandpit to play in, but mostly because that's me holding the lightsaber on the homepage today. Definitely my better side, I think.

Talking The Devil Into Going To Church

I've thought of something that needs a new word - the problem is, the only one I can come up with makes a rather shallow incision into the mustard. But it'll have to do for now:

Andiscipation (n). - The apprehension of pleasure experienced when undressing a cellophane-wrapped "keep case" housing a newly-purchased DVD, or other 5" media disc.

I really get off on that. Sometimes I leave the wrapping on, just to enhance the pleasure when I come to watch the disc for the first time. I cut a tragic figure, I know - but if you've not worked that out by now, you aren't paying attention.

The latest item to proffer me this agreeable experience sits on my lap as I type. It is a Region 1 DVD of the 1947 Cary Grant movie "The Batchelor and the Bobby-Soxer", known here in Region 2 - or it would be if it existed as a DVD here, at any rate - as "Bachelor Knight". It has taken me ages to find a copy of this terrific flick, but my resort to Region 1 has rewarded me with extra andiscipatory glee, as of course those careful 1'ers will insist on sealing their keep-cases with labelled tape, necessitating the application of a craft knife or similar implement, with the inevitable ratcheting-up of the concommitant andiscipation.

I haven't seen the movie in a few years, but I really must commend it to all wholeheartedly. The restaurant scene is worth the ticket alone, with Grant on fire with a masterclass in subtle physical comedy. "Happy Birthday, Mr. Rosenheimer!" is a comedy moment more worthy of immortality than... a hundred immortal ones, and "I couldn't help overhearing - I had my ear pressed to the door!" is the seventh-funniest line in a movie, ever. So there. See it. You'll thank me.

Meganews

Another day, another baby - when is the Human Race going to be finished?

A big W&M welcome, then, to Megan Ann Mahoney. Congratulations to Liz for successfully negotiating her debut, and to Gary for resisting the urge to call her Perpugilliam, or something. Huzzahs all round.

Nip & Tuck

Ouch.

Right, that's it - if any more bits of my body doth offend me, I'm going to cut them off.

I expect to be a brain in a jar by 2015...

Sex, Lies & Splott

Another Little Disappointment � Torchwood: Episode 10

Sums up pretty much everyone's current feelings about TW, I'd say.

Still, Cardiff, eh?

Cardiff. Cardiff. CARDIFF!!!

(Its mountains so lofty, its treetops so tall etc.)

Meanwhile, I'm off into hospital again. I'll soon qualify for frequent flyer mileage. It's only local anaesthetic, but even so - if I should die, think only this of me: They weren't supposed to cut that bit off!!